25 Random Facts About Me

1. I'm addicted to food. Can't stop eating, not even after my stomach has gotten so full that I can't move.
2. I'm the most spoiled cat in the neighborhood, my mom's favorite. Was Gary's favorite too (former dad).
3. I used to be called Pumpkin (by Gary & Anne for 2 yrs). Then I was named Julio, after my mom's high school cat that looked like me.
4. I think nothing of grabbing food from under my brother's nose while he's eating. I do the same to my other siblings. If that doesn't work, I just push them outside the place/bowl while they're eating with small nudges.
5. My mom *thinks* I'm a cat but I'm actually a lion. King of the back yard, the back alley, the 'jungle' behind the alley, the house, and the basement. All cats OBEY ME ! Roarrrr!
6. My mom * thinks* she's my only mom but I actually hang out at 2 other houses nearby, and meow for food whenever my *mom* puts me on a diet. A neighbor uncovered my plot and told my mom who is now trying to find out who's feeding me and ruining my diet.
7. I have actually lost weight since Ilana got 100% custody of me (over Ben from last yr).
8. When I was little, I didn't bother to lick/groom my fur, which make my fur really clumpy. I had huge clumps of hair sticking out my back that made me look like a stegosaurus. My parents thought I had a skin disease until somebody told them I was just lazy/ignorant about grooming.
9. I hate beeing picked up, held, stroked, fussed, petted in any way. Especially by humans who insist on putting me on a diet (and by that I mean my mom).
10. When my mom scolds me, when I get scared, and when I feel like crying, I go to my brother Smores and rub my head against his. I don't know what I would do without him.
11. My mom and I share a repulsion for Peter-the-Puke, a scary, ugly, calculating, hostile cat that intrudes in the back yard and picks fights with me. His fur has various greenish-grey hues and patterns, that make his long hair look like somebody has puked all over him. He also has a yellowish butt. Totally scary.
12. Whenever Peter is approaching, I make an alarm-like sound that sounds like an ambulance (eaow-aow-aow-aow...). My mom thought it was an ambulance the first time she heard it, then looked out the window and saw me & Peter in a face-off.
13. I am actually a semi-feral cat myself, and shouldn't be afraid of Peter, but he's so horrendous, he gives me the creeps. Last summer he scratched my eye and for several weeks afterwards I never left the back yard.
14. I like going hunting with my brother Smores. We do "collaborative hunting": Smores does the killing (of birds, mice, squirrels) and I do the eating. Meow-meow.
15. I don't really *eat* the creatures we hunt, just deposit them infront of the kitchen door as a bribe to my mom for more food (real catfood). That freaks my mom out and I dont understand why.
16. No matter how much I hate Peter, I still like eating his leftovers. Ben used to feed Peter tons of food, while I was on a diet and was not allowed to interact with Peter (let alone eat his food). So, of course, I craved his food. My mom then expelled Peter from the back yard with tactics of fear and intimidation, and forbade Ben to feed any cats, at all.
17. A few days ago (April 2010) I got food poisoning, and my mom had to try for 2 days to get me in a carrier. When she finally tricked me into it, I went ballistic and broke my front paw nails & bled my nose while fighting with the metal door.My FB friends rushed to help me and took me & my mom to the emergency clinic. 3 days later I got a bad cold, lost my voice and couldnt meow, and had a stuffy nose that being a lion, I couldn't blow.
18. When my mom moves out of the current house to a new city, she's planning on taking me and Smores along with her. I'm not excited about that, I'd rather stay here with Ben and eat non stop for the rest of my life. Meow-meow. When I see her trying to trap me, I will put up the fiercest fight of my life.Roarrrr!!!!
19. I miss Gary, my former dad, he was nice to me, fed me lots of food, never tried to pick me up, just petted my head a little bit. I used to hang out with him at his doorsteps and spend the summer evenings in his company. Meowwwww
20. I also miss Ben (who still lives next door but has been forbidden to feed me anymore). He used to feed me TONS of food. I still hang out at his doorstep sometimes and look at his kitchen windows with a look of expectation and longing, but we're not allowed to interact anymore,according to my mom.
21. I enjoy chasing, smacking, slapping, and generally terrorizing my little sister Stubbly, who annoys me immensely for reasons unknown to me/my mom. Stubbly has some sort of mental disability, and is acting like a baby despite her age. My mom thinks I'm being mean to her and tries to stop me all the time.
22. I'm hopelessly claustrophobic. I can't stand the thought let alone the fact of the back door being closed. I dont mind hanging out indoors, I just cant stand the sight of the door closing.Which means my mom has to trick me to get the door closed. At first I used to cry a lot, but now I just accept the fact thtat I've been tricked whenever this happens, and I run to the basement immediately upon hearing the door getting closed.
23. In December/ January, I would NOT let my mom close the door under no circumstances, so she had to keep the door open in the midst of the winter otherwise I wouldnt stay in the house.
24. Last winter, according to a neighbor, I and my brother Smores got trapped in a huge dark basement of a nearby building, and spent a month there till management let us out. I was under Ben's care then and he didnt realize any of this, nor did my mom.Idiots.
25. I can't think of anything else to say, so I'll just add that I'm the sweetest cat there ever was! meow-meow. Actually here's a last thing about me: when I meow, I like to repeat the same phrase twice, meow-meow, in staccato rhythm. Meow-meow.